That goal will become more and more elusive if the present trend of sexual violence continues. Sexual violence has become part of the norm in this country and now represents a mental health, medical, and legal crisis, that threatens loving intimate relationships as well of the health of our entire society.
Data from the Women's Foundation of Colorado's 2013 report revealed that, of women over 18, one in four (an estimated 415,000 women) had been raped. Almost twice that many (870,000) experienced sexual violence other than rape, and 10% of the High School girls reported being forced to have sex (rape). The damage done is reaching epidemic levels across the country.
This is made more critical because of the state of our penal system where over 3 million are incarcerated, way more than any other country. In our justice system it happens too often that guilty white, wealthy people are found innocent when they are quilty; while black/brown poor people who are innocent are found guilty. One of every 3 black boys will end up incarcerated, equaling more blacks than were owned during slavery.
Jon Krakauer, in his book, Missoula, reported that "eighty present of victims are raped by someone they know". A rapist can be your doctor, your boss, your clergyman/priest, your teacher, your partner, your lover, your husband, your friend or your date. The 20 percent, who are unknown to the victim, may to be composed of serial rapists who roam our country raping and brutalizing thousands and thousands of women and children. About 3% of all rapists are caught and incarcerated for a few years and released. There are 170 such registered sex offenders living in my little community of 70,000 in Colorado, according to the Coloradoan Newspaper.
I'm not talking about the fumbling, scary period during the early teens when both young girls and boys are attempting to figure out how to communicate their longing and often fail to communicate clearly before they get the hang of it. With no intention of forcing or hurting each other, they may misjudge. That is the reason for statutory rape laws, to protect children under the age of consent.
Too often there is a wink and nod when it becomes known that a woman is raped, which we see most clearly in male fraternities, courts, and news reports. Like "we all know it's what a woman really wants." Let me tell you very clearly that is not what women want any more than men want to be raped. It is an experience that diminishes their lives, often for ever, and therefore their ability to totally share themselves in a loving relationship.
It is estimated that 54% of women do not report being raped. I believe that because I can't remember that any of the women who have told me about their rape experience had reported it to the police. Even more silent is male rape. We've known about male rape in prisons and the military services, but in the research I did at Rutger's in the 70's and 80's, I was shocked when 14% of the men had been raped in a population of 25,000 undergraduates. More research on male rape is greatly needed.
Psychological damage includes:
* seriously damaged self concept
* clinical depression, often for years
* impaired social ability
* ruined or diminished career
* profound guilt and shame (women have traditionally been blamed)
Physical results include;
* bodily injury
* contracting HIV or other sexual transmitted decease (STD's)
* pregnancy
Then the trauma continues:
- If a person reports the rape, they are often treated with disrespect by policemen.
- They are then sent to a Hospital to have the evidence collected in a Rape Kit. That process sometimes feels like they are being raped again.
- Then they are charged up to $2000 by the hospital. Rape Kits, and tests for STD's are often not covered by insurance.
- If it is a Catholic hospital a woman will not be given the morning after pill.
- Then the police may choose not to send the Rape Kit to be analyzed to get the DNA for a conviction, but instead they are put in a store room. According to the Attorney General in 2014 there were 400,000+ Rape Kits, not analyzed, in such store rooms in this country's police stations. Think about that!
- If the rapist is caught, which about 3% are, and it goes to trial, it is another huge trauma for a woman who can seldom convince anyone that she was forced.
- She then has to deal with the legal costs.
- If she is impregnated she has to decide: adoption, abortion, or becoming a mother when that is the last thing she needs or wants. Also, according to Esther Suckerman on the web, 31 states allow a rapists custody and visitation rights of the child.
- I had a opportunity to speak with a staff member from a prison for rapists, they were successfully treating them to help them heal. He said that a high percent of them had been sexually abused as children.